


My Fearless Friend

by lmaohae



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Canon Related, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-16 00:17:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16074395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lmaohae/pseuds/lmaohae
Summary: Heechul walks into the living room and gasps. Not only is the living room well-organised; every magazine that had been strewn across the floor the past week has been returned to their original positions on the shelf, and every article of clothing that covered the couch has disappeared; but someone has turned on his robot vacuum. He looks at the gadget as it slides across the floor, picking up every speck of dust and dirt it comes in contact with. He thinks. Must be Leeteuk, he guesses.





	My Fearless Friend

**Author's Note:**

> I woke up today, suddenly thinking about how Heechul will be sitting out of this comeback. And while I understand his decision and the plight he's in that led to it, I can't help but to wonder how he's feeling about everything. His recent video on Instagram where he admits to his drinking problem is worrying too. I felt like writing this piece to bring comfort to my many unanswered questions, and hopefully to bring comfort to my readers, too. It's a simple and short piece, so I hope you enjoy it.

     Rays of sunlight peer into the room through the crack of the tinted bedroom window, painting Heechul's face a bright yellow. He groans and turns over, covering his face with a pillow. The insides of his skull are akin to a busy construction site; throbbing and quaking from the impact of an imaginary loud banging of tools and equipment, and a very real aftermath of intoxication. He only has himself to blame. He had spent the previous night alone at a small pub, working his liver to the point of exhaustion with bottle after bottle of soju in a sorry attempt to drown out the loneliness. It doesn't work, of course; it never has. At this point, he only does it out of habit. He knows it's a habit that he needs to bid goodbye to, but it's hard. Shifting under the covers, Heechul groans once more, unable to ignore the intense brightness of the light that finds its way into the room. He sits up and stretches noisily, his arms jabbing into the air around him. Then he flinches. An extreme pang in his left leg causes him to draw his knees to his chest, gently massaging his left leg to alleviate the pain. He sighs.

     Getting off the bed slowly, Heechul slips his feet into his bedroom slippers and stands up, holding onto the bedside drawer for leverage. It's a Sunday, which means having an entire day to himself to clean the house. He knows for a fact that the house is in a state of absolute disarray, considering how he's been neglecting the mess throughout the week because he simply didn't have the time to do anything about it. He opens the bedroom door and frowns as soon as a tantalising fragrance wafts into the room. Someone is here, and that someone is in the kitchen that he almost never uses, cooking. He curses himself for all the times he's been asked for the passcode to his front door's digital lock and given it out so readily.

     Heechul walks into the living room and gasps. Not only is the living room well-organised; every magazine that had been strewn across the floor the past week has been returned to their original positions on the shelf, and every article of clothing that covered the couch has disappeared; but someone has turned on his robot vacuum. He looks at the gadget as it slides across the floor, picking up every speck of dust and dirt it comes in contact with. He thinks.  _Must be Leeteuk,_ he guesses. He runs his fingers through his hair, his fingers getting caught in the tangles of his bedhead hair and shuffles towards the kitchen, yawning. He sees the back view of the culprit in his kitchen and grins.

          "Y'know, hyung, you should've at least called before coming over," he says, rubbing his head.

          "Hyung?"

     The culprit turns around. Heechul raises his brows, surprised.

          "Oh? Hyukjae?" He sits at the dining table, unable to disguise the shock on his face. "I thought you were Leeteuk."

     Hyukjae turns off the stove and picks up the frying pan. He walks to the dining table and empties the pan onto a serving plate in the middle of the table with a spatula, smiling. Heechul glosses over the spread of food on the table; looks like they'll be having scrambled eggs with toast and sausages for breakfast, all thanks to Hyukjae. It's been a while since Heechul has had a proper, home-made breakfast.

          "What are you doing here?" He asks the younger man, who is now rummaging through the fridge.

     Hyukjae returns to the table with a carton of orange juice and two glasses. He sets the glasses down and pours juice into them one at a time.

          "What do you mean what am I doing here, hyung?" He questions back, capping the carton and taking a seat opposite Heechul. "I've been at this for the past few months while you slept in bed, minus the cooking. Today is special. Anyway, don't I at least get a good morning?"

     He hands Heechul a serving spoon and nods towards the food, prompting Heechul to scoop some food onto the empty plate in front of him.

          "Leeteuk hyung told me you haven't been feeling well, so I thought I'd drop by today and make you breakfast since i don't have any plans today," Hyukjae continues to explain, taking a sip from his glass.

     Heechul stuffs his mouth with toast, thinking.  _What is with this boy all of a sudden?_

"You really didn't have to, Hyukjae." He says with a mouth full of food, stabbing his fork into a sausage. "I'm fine, really."

     He eats quietly, watching the younger man cut into a piece of toast with his knife. Then he stops, setting his knife and fork down. Hyukjae interlaces his fingers and positions his clasped hands in front of his face.

          "It's been years since Intimate Note, Heechul hyung. You don't have to be awkward with me anymore," he reminds, his voice dripping in sincerity. "Besides, all of us are worried."

     Heechul swallows, frowning. "All of us? Who's all of us?"

          "The other members. We know you've been blaming yourself for sitting out of the comeback," Hyukjae explains, blinking his eyes. "And I know you've been drinking to suppress how you feel too. Hyung, you've literally asked me out for drinks at least fifteen times in the past month, and even when I tell you I can't because of my schedule, you either keep asking me, or turn to the other members. We're all worried about you."

     Scooping some more food onto his plate, Heechul snorts, and Hyukjae knows the older man is trying to hide his discomfort. Afterall, even after more than a decade of being together, the man has always been uncomfortable with people showering him with concern. He hates being, in his own words, "a burden". And Hyukjae hates it just as much that he considers himself one in the first place. He stares at Heechul.

          "How are you  _really_ feeling?" He asks before eating a spoonful of eggs, waiting for an answer.

     Heechul finishes his food and stands up, walking over to the sink. He turns his back to Hyukjae and begins washing his plate, avoiding the question at hand. He hears Hyukjae shift in his seat, sighing loudly.

          "Look, hyung, I know I haven't been the best dongsaeng to you," Hyukjae mutters apologetically, his tone full of hesitance, "but I love you. I really do. You're one of the closest things I have to knowing what it's like having an older brother, and I want to be the closest thing you have to knowing what it's like having a little brother, too."

     Heechul switches off the tap and places his plate on the dish rack, back still turned to the younger man. He stands by the sink, leaning against it to lessen the strain standing had on his left leg. He continues to listen.

          "And I know it makes you feel bad sitting out of the comeback even though you  _know_ it's for your own good, and you worry all the time what the rest of the members, and even the fans, think. I know you're used to acting like you don't care what anyone thinks of you, but it's written all over your face and shows in your actions, hyung. It really does. Even now I keep worrying over and over how I should let you know I care and worry about you, and that you can lean on me if you ever need someone and I just—"

          "Hyukjae ah, come here." Heechul intercepts, turning around.

     A brief silence divides them as Hyukjae stands up and walks over to his hyung, no hesitation. Out of nowhere, Heechul pulls the younger man into a tight embrace, patting his head. Hyukjae's body is tense, but he gradually melts into the older man's arms after e convinces himself that maybe this is all the man needs, at least for now. He wraps his arms around Heechul and smiles faintly, still worried. Heechul sighs into the younger man's shoulder and purses his lips, allowing them to stay in this position for a while. For a good five minutes or so, time stands still.

          "I know you care about me," Heechul finally opens up, his face still buried in the dip of Hyukjae's shoulder. "I love you too. Really. It's really embarassing for me to admit, but I do. You really are like a little brother to me, so don't worry about that, understand?"

     Hyukjae pulls away, staring Heechul straight in the eye blankly.

          "Hyung," he begins, deadpan. "If you're gonna admit you love me, then don't be embarassed! It's been more than a decade and this is the first time you're ever really telling me you love me. That doesn't include when you do it in front of a camera."

     He smiles widely, revealing his pink gums.

          "Say it again please."

          "Hey."

          "Please, hyung? Please?"

          "Hey, hey, hey!" Heechul raises his voice. "Don't push it!"

     Hyukjae grins his gummy smile again, and the older man can't help but to pinch his cheeks in pure frustration.

          "Ah, Lee Hyukjae," Heechul sighs, squishing Hyukjae's cheeks until the flesh turned white beneath his fingertips. "Sometimes life gets me down and all but you make me feel a lot better." He rubs his head sheepishly.

          "I mean you and  _the rest_ of course. You  _all_ make me feel better."

     Returning to his seat at the dining table, Hyukjae smirks. He sits down and picks up his utensils and digs in again, pleased. Heechul shifts about in his spot awkwardly, unsure of what to do next. He rarely ever tells anyone he loves them because, afterall, after years of being in the industry, he built up a persona of unfeeling bluntness and grit. He rarely ever got touchy feely with his emotions, both on and off camera, so his sudden confession surprised him more than it does Hyukjae. However, Heechul has always been a very strong-willed person; even Hyukjae knows that; so as low as his mood may dip because of the current circumstances, he knows that this loneliness; a phase; too, will pass. He thinks about how he has nothing planned for the day, and how he initially thought of spending the day alone.

          "Hyukjae ah," he calls out to the younger man, avoiding eye contact. "Are you free to spend the day with this bored and lonely hyung of yours?"

     Hyukjae sets his fork down, swallowing. "I thought you'd never ask."


End file.
